Game of Thrones Season 2 Quotes

I'm a monster, as well as a dwarf. You should charge me double.

Tyrion

Would it be excessive of me to ask you to save my life twice in a week?

Tyrion

My father is dead. And the only parent I have left has no right to call anyone reckless.

Robb

Any man dies with a clean sword, I'll rape his fu-king corpse!

Sandor (The Hound)

The gods have no mercy, that's why they're gods.

Cersei
Varys: I'm not entirely sure what you're suggesting. 
Tyrion: I'm entirely sure, you're entirely sure, what I'm suggesting.
Varys: I've always hated the bells. They ring for horror, a dead king, a city under siege. 
Tyrion: A wedding. 
Varys: Exactly.

Sansa: What about the king?
Hound: He can die just fine on his own.

Those are brave men knocking at our door. Let's go kill them!

Tyrion

Tears aren't a woman's only weapon. The best one's between your legs.

Cersei

I much like my head. I don't want to see it removed just yet.

Tyrion.
Shae: Some of those boys will never come back.
Sansa: Joffrey will. The worst ones always live.
Bronn: Do you know how to use that?
Tyrion: I chopped wood once. No, actually, I watched my brother chop wood.
Tyrion: I'm the captain. If this ship goes down, I go down with it.
Varys: I'm sure many captains said the same when the ship was afloat.
Tyrion: You can't fuck your way out of everything.
Shae: I have so far.

The Lord of Light wants his enemies burnt. The Drowned God wants his enemies drowned. Why are all the gods such vicious c-nts? Where is the god of t-ts and wine?

Tyrion Lannister

You're quite good at being Hand, you know. Jon Arryn and Ned Stark were good men, honorable men. But they disdained the game and those who play it. You enjoy the game. And you play it well.

Varys

I will hurt you for this. A day will come when you think you are safe and happy, and your joy will turn to ashes in your mouth. And you will know the debt is paid.

Tyrion Lannister

You've forgotten the most important thing about whores. You don't buy them, you only rent them.

Tyrion Lannister

Has anyone ever told you you're as boring as you are ugly?

Jaime Lannister

I asked him, How can a man be brave if he's afraid? That is the only time a man can be brave, he told me.

Robb Stark

You love your children. It's your one redeeming quality; that and your cheekbones.

Tyrion

They'll bend the knee or I'll destroy them.

Stannis
Jaime: Three victories don't make you a conquerer.
Robb: It's better than three defeats.

Power is power.

Cersei

There's a king in ever corner now

Catelyn